The Mother Load

At least, fat babies previously excluded from medical insurance coverage by Rocky Mountain Health Plans can now breathe a little easier and enjoy their daily doses of double cheeseburgers and chili cheese fries their moms are no doubt serving up in their bottles.

According to this story, the Grand Junction based insurance company decided 4 month old, Alex Lange, who weighed in at the 99th percentile for infants his age, was a little too roly poly for coverage. The story didn't mention whether baby Alex was fed formula, mother's milk, or potato skins. Whatever he was eating, insurers decided it was cause for a denial based on a pre-existing condition of obesity.

Obama? Are you listening? Can you say, "Extremely cute poster child for health care reform?" (YES, HE CAN!)

I can imagine the honchos at this insurance company in an art gallery full of priceless renderings of chubby cherubs. "Look at the risk assessment on that one! Type 2 diabetes by the time he's 3. Massive coronary by 6. Physical therapy...lap band...divide the four...carry the two...DENIAL!"

Of course, any sane person will tell you little Alex isn't obese, he's a BABY. Someone at Rocky Mountain Health Plans recrunched the numbers and the company is now backpedaling faster than a portly preschooler on a tricycle who just overshot the ice cream truck. According to a rep, the company will be rewriting its policy so it no longer denies coverage to big babies.

That's right, tubby tots. Forget the milk and bland cereal. You can have all the pizza you want.