Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Why it pays to be over ten.


Mom, today I learned that painting is the dumbest project ever and it's NOT FAIR!


And Miriam and Cate are stupid-heads who get to do everything just because they're older.

Where did I learn such a thing?


Three guesses.

(Thanks to Evelyn for letting me tease her on my blog.  She's really a sweet girl.  She's just not loving the limits of her single digit age.)

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Ever see something that makes you laugh hysterically even though you're unsure why? This is one of those things. It's been on YouTube for a few years now, but it was only brought to my attention in the last few days, so I'm posting it here for those like me who didn't get to see its silliness when it was new.

This is definitely more fun if you've seen "The Dark Knight" and are familiar with Christian Bale's nearly unintelligible Angry Batman Voice. (We forgive Christian Bale because he's Christian Bale...and because he was so cute in Newsies.)

The closing credits are as much fun as the whole video.


Mom, today I learned that if I'm going to make fun of pictures like this on my blog...


I should probably avoid taking pictures like this. (Seriously? Only two spaces apart in my Photobucket album.)

I try not to get political too often over here, what with this being a humor blog and my being a blogger who likes readers of all stripes.  There are times, however, when I just have to speak, demographics be an angry God...with, uh, the weather?

So, Michele Bachmann, that darling of the Tea Party and the media alike (for very different reasons), has offered the press yet another Bachmannism in a long list of ridiculous sound bites, and the press?  They are reporting with apparent glee.

See, there's a pretty big storm over on the east coast.  You may have noticed it on the news, the Weather Channel, Facebook...  People are dying, cities are under water, homes and business have been damaged, some beyond repair.  It's a tragedy, is what I'm saying.  It's nothing to joke about, is what I mean.

So, Ms. Bachmann is tired of people in Washington not listening to "the American people."  She means the American people who agree with her, but okay.  So, she made a speech about it, and in it, Bachmann said that the recent earthquake and hurricane were God's way of getting Washington's attention.

Right.  Because God really doesn't like politicians?  Because God is a Republican? Because God has read through the health care legislation and realizes Obama means for all of us to go see doctors and not faith healers? I'm not really sure how God and the weather factor in here, but maybe I'm a little dense about these things.

Now confronted on her statement, Bachmann is backpedaling, saying that, of course, she was being humorous.  Unfortunately, the esteemed congresswoman from Minnesota doesn't understand that in order for something to be humorous, it has to actually be funny.  It's kind of a prerequisite.  I know because this is a humor blog, and it frequently makes me laugh.

Examples of things that are funny:

* Babies reacting to their first taste of lemon.
* Weird Al songs
* Eric D. Snider
* Rhythmically challenged people trying to dance
* My husband (see above)

Things that are not funny:

* Movies starring Rob Schneider
* IRS audits
* Hemmorhoids
* Starving kittens
* Politicians using natural disasters to further their own agendas while pretending to speak for God.

I'm not writing this to just jump on the anti-Bachmann bandwagon. I defended Bachmann in a recent opinion column I wrote for the University of Utah paper, for goodness' sake.  I just wish the woman would give me a reason to defend her rather than fodder for a strongly worded retraction. 

I should write her a letter.

I wonder if she'll listen to me... If her "humor" is any indication, she'll be expecting a tornado or a monsoon if she doesn't.

Monday, August 29, 2011


Mom, today I learned that people who can't afford real advertising think I'm dumb enough to believe they can pay me thousands of dollars a week.