The Mother Load

Today's Stupid Product had me in a bit of a quandary for quite awhile as I tried to write this post. I could see this was a Stupid Product, but it didn't really scream stupid. Usually when that happens, I write the review both ways, calling the product a Stupid Awesome Product. However, the Falcon Carseat Carrier doesn't in any way fit into the Awesome designation.

I almost want to create a brand new category for this one. I think I'd call it a "Nice Try" product. The makers saw a common problem facing mothers of babies and attempted to resolve it with an invention. I have to give them credit for seeing a need and trying to fill it. Unfortunately, they just didn't fill it very well. Nice try, guys.

The problem the manufacturers were trying to address involves infant carseat/carriers. These are the small carseats with handles which are meant to hold babies up to 20 pounds. The handles were invented to fool tired, overworked mothers into believing these things could be used to easily transport a baby wherever mom might be going. Anyone who's had to lug one of these around for more than five minutes knows they're heavy, bulky, and hard to maneuver.

The makers of the Falcon Carseat Carrier decided the solution to this problem would be to invent a strap that could be fitted to the carseat and worn over the shoulder of whatever person drew the short straw and had to carry the carrier around. According to the website, the makers see this as an alternative to setting up a stroller.

I guess you could say it's kind of like a purse I once had. I could hold it by the handles or I could attach the strap and go "hands free." The difference between my purse and an infant carrier is a whole lot of heavy duty plastic and a small human being. Adding a strap to my purse did not carry with it the threat of permanent damage to my neck, shoulders, or spine.  The Falcon Carseat Carrier may make a carrier hands free, but it doesn't make it any lighter.

Here's the Falcon in action. The best I can guess is that this is footage taped for a commercial for the product, but the commercial was never actually made, so they just posted this on YouTube in order for all that work not to go to waste. I love that they left in the direction the filmmaker gives to the actress. Couldn't possibly have edited that out, could you, buddy?



If you're as observant as I am, you'll have noticed that the woman in this video frequently had her hands on the carrier as she walked. You'll also have noticed that she's not going on any long hikes or walks with the carrier. She's moving from building to car/car to building, the way most mothers do. For these quick transports, hooking an arm under the handle of the carseat is surely not that hard, and it wouldn't cost a mom $20.

Anyone who thinks we moms want to heft one of these carseats for more than 10 feet at a go has obviously never had to do it for long periods. I think the makers of this product should try walking a mile with the weight of a baby and his carrier threatening to separate their shoulders from the rest of their torsos. I'm willing to bet that after a quarter mile, they're going to be offering the baby as a future indentured servant to anyone willing to let them borrow a stroller.