Thursday, March 10, 2011

Awesome Product: The KidDictionary

You know that thing your kid does?  That thing that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever?  That thing that YOU certainly never did when YOU were a kid?  Ever wish you could find a way to laugh at it?  Parents, you're in luck! Today's Awesome Product, The KidDictionary, will not only give you the means to laugh (hysterically) at the strange and sometimes irritating foibles of your children, it will also give you the words to describe them.

You can see what I'm talking about below.

People, I am buying both versions of this book, and author and self described "lexiconnoisseur," Eric Ruhalter, doesn't even have to be my best friend. All he had to do was make me laugh with his made up words. And oh, did he make me laugh.  ( make up a word as delectable as lexiconnoisseur, and I will be YOUR best friend.)

A few other gems from the book:

  • UPPTITUDE (UPP tih-tewd)  n : The intense desire to be the one who presses the button in an elevator. 
  • DOMESTIC VIOLATION (doh-MESS-tik  VY-o-lay-shun) v :The potentially lethal mistake of referring to a stay-at-home mom as someone who “does not work.” 
  • DETASTE  (dee-TAYST)  v :  To harbor a deep hatred and disgust for a food you have never tried. 
  • TOYPHOON (toy-FOON) n : Routine recreational activities of children that leave their playroom looking like it was decimated by a hurricane. 
  • GARBOFLAGE  (GAHR-boh-flaj) v : To hide a piece of your child’s artwork under other trash in the wastebasket so they don’t catch you throwing it away. 
  • WISHJACK  (WISH-jak) v:  To blow out the candles on another child's birthday cake
You've used the garboflage trick a time or two, haven't you?  I remember distinctly the day my sister in law forgot to garboflage the massive amounts of loose paper drawings she had cleaned from my nephew Ryan's desk and discarded in the outside garbage bin.  The look of absolute devastation on this five year old's face was never to be forgotten.  This book could have saved the kid some trauma.  (More on Ryan in an all new Mother Load column out later today!)

If you are a parent, if you have a parent, or if you know a parent, you need to buy this book.  Someone's having a birthday today (just check Facebook!).  Mother's Day is in the near future.  Father's Day will quickly follow.  And while I think it's always too early for stores to put out their Christmas decorations, I think it's never too early to think of your Christmas shopping, especially when you find a product as awesome as this one.

The fact that Eric Ruhalter will be your best friend if you buy it is just the icing on the wishjacked cake.

(Thanks to Eric R. of NJ for the heads up on today's Awesome Product.  Eric wisely used the my submissions email address to let me know he had a product that needed to be seen here.  That takes gumption, people, and I'm all about rewarding gumption.  It helped that his email made me laugh like an unhinged diva on her way to a padded room.  If you have an Awesome Product you think needs to be profiled here, by all means, email me and let me know about it!)


Barbara L said...

Found @KidDictionary on Twitter and have been laughing ever since! Seriously funny stuff.
Parents, Grand Parents, Parent Wanna Bees, people who like to laugh all should buy these books. I don't know the author personally and no one asked me to make this comment. I just appreciate someone spreading laughter.